My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
he kept opening the car door while we were ON THE HIGHWAY and insisting he could walk. next time i drive my boss home at 3am i'm putting the child lock on
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Randomize
