WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"
hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
Randomize