She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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