No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
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