are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
he thought i was a dude.
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
