i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
my mom just used "raw dog" in a sentence correctly, time to move out.
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
Randomize
