Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
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