were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
I guess the wine stains on your shirt and the $2 vodka tonics you're sweating out just scream, "Welcome to DC, please ask me for directions."
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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