is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
