? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
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