My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
