How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Randomize
