Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
NoShamevember. You game?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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