I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
Randomize
