We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
I'm both gender and math confused
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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