He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The world is my kaleidiscope. I see whatever the alcohol wants me to.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I broke my arm trying to do a hand stand in my shower to wash the hate out of my asshole.
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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