I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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