She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I NEED YOU TO TELL ME ITS OKAY TO BE THIS HIGH
Yes
O.K.
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
- I'm finally learning to be functional when I'm high. I feel like this is a milestone.
I just choked eating whip cream from the can, and peed a little because I was coughing so hard. How am I still single.
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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