since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Found your dick twin last night
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
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