why didn't you poke me back
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
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