Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
Only good thing about being an essential worker is that I have a letter allowing me to cross the bridge into jersey to get booze
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
Randomize