There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I thought he was having it in Athens. Alright. Have fun. Please save my dignity and refrain from talking about my boobs and sexual "abilities". If I have any. I just feel like they are going to ask. Repeat after me. And repeat it 5 more times. This is going to be the phrase you're going to rely on tonight: "I can neither deny or confirm such actions."
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
