Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize
