i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
New invention idea: vibrating tampons
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
My ex husband is now my side piece. #thisis30
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
