we have officially lost it.
I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
I pretended I didn't remember seeing him hookup with that freshman, and he pretended he didn't remember seeing me hookup with that old guy. We have a beautiful and unawkward friendship.
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Did body shots with a guy... Ended up being the ref of my volleyball game... So that's why we won
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
Randomize
