As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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