Oh my god. I just envisioned myself eating panda meat. I need to get out of this class.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
sometimes i think what itd be like to be a firework
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
If he wants a future he'd best figure out the calendar function on his phone. If he can invite you to his penis he can invite you to his google cal.
Randomize
