So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
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