2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I can't turn off my feet"
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize
