if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Me. At least after what I've been through.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
My math professor just asked us to draw the graph of the derivative of our drunkenness from friday to sunday. Dear Jesus this looks bad.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize