You work out of a Hotel?
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
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