It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
I am spending my child support on dildos
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize
