I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
