Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
i am one UTI away from banning your fingers from my vagina
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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