I just pynch a tree in the face
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Randomize
