What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
If I had a dollar for every functioning brain cell you had I would owe someone a lot of money
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