I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I mean, I already put pants on today. We're already halfway there
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize