i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
I didn’t eat all day. Got really drunk at a bruins game and puked in a random dunkies cup on the T
If that doesn’t scream I’m from New England, I don’t know what does
Randomize
