He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
why does drunk me think that doing things like throwing up on my desk and all over my 15 page lab report is okay
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
I would like to make it known to all of you that my penis is official retired, but it thanks you for the countless years of service you provided
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
