How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
