She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
i woke up with a shattered plate next to my head.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Found your dick twin last night
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
Hold on gotta plunge the sink
Is that a euphemism for sex? Either way, have a good time
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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