if i can run in heels then i can drive
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I told her i was enlisting in the air force tomorrow.....it was like the activation code to her vagina
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
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