Whoa Z and x make the same sound
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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