dude my grandmas the shit. she has a sixth grade education and got hit by a car when she was 18. she cant smell.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
If you take a post shower shit just get back in bed. You're better off starting your whole morning all over again.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Randomize
