too bad you live with your parents still
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
My pussy is not your playground.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I know he’s a bad decision but he's casual, his penis is amazing and his technique is on point.
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize
