I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I dig being used for consequence free sex. Not consequenceful sex.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
