happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I'm almost positive that you shat in a birdhouse
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
Hey do you remember me?
You were a giant banana.... how could I forget.
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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