i find it a beautiful talent that i know how much pubic hair the girl in the next stall has just from the sound of her urine
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
Ask me how many people I've slept with. Because its changed since I last saw you.
I saw you 20 MINUTES AGO. You need to stop this.
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
the best part about being a teacher is there are always 20 little kids around me to blame my farts on
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
With your fertility you would just get contact pregnant
It's blow job season.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
