Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
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