I must be too annoying 4 u.
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
I got kicked out of the bar but no one cared, I dont have any money so i stayed outside with the bouncer for an hour and he got so sick of me he let me back in on the condition that i cant leave my seat. VISIT ME
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
